A Brief History of Technology
It's kind of strange to think modern day technology runs off of an economy of planned obsolescence. Things are made to break in a way that is unique to our time period. Just consider, back when we were roughing it and dependent on the chemical process of combustion (see: fire) to survive--I don't think anyone thought how fast can I design this torch to go out before anyone catches on? No, they tried everything they could to get that small flame to last as long as damn possible because they were just trying to survive on a space rock that was cold and dark as hell half the time.
Take that lightbulb that's been burning for 115 years in a Livermore, California fire station. Have you ever changed a light bulb originally placed by someone who died on the Titanic? Sure, there's no sound business plan for Century+ light bulb designs. You'd sell one and die before you ever saw a repeat customer. But that doesn't mean you have to be entirely at the mercy of a model that sells you short, literally.
Honestly, all I really wanted to talk about here was Micro-USB cables and look what happens. Micro-USB cables are everywhere. Currently, they're one of the most popular compatibility options for your devices. But they really suck, don't they? Don't worry, you can admit it, "I am a friend." They're bullshit.
What's the issue you ask? They stop fitting snug in your device. They get loose, they fall out and stop charging or transferring data or whatever your cable was doing before a breeze of air came by and knocked it out faster than the LA Clippers. And a cable that isn't plugged in is about as useful as a piece of string (or the LA Clippers). Don't worry; this isn't your fault. Micro-USB is simply a bad design, and unsurprisingly, it spread worldwide (see: religion).
Instead of throwing them out every 3-6 months, we'd like to show you how to save yourself money AND fight back against Capitalism from your very own home. Luckily for you, it's very simple.
First off, always buy quality cables. Cheap cables break a lot faster, simple as that.
But if you're having problems with cables you already own, here are three solutions (and usually it only takes one to fix the problem):
1) Pull out connector holder pins (just grab a nail clipper for this one)
2) Expand the width of the connector head.
- Gently press width wise on the connector head (use pliers).
3) Clean the Micro-USB charge port on your device.
- Use a nonmetal, thin, and stiff plastic to clean lint and dust from your device.
Check out our video if you want a more visual approach to the above:
If you're still having issues, don't worry, we've got your back. Use code - MICROFIX = 15% of all cables
Better quality, 12-month warranty, fast charge, long length.
This article contains jokes and generalizations about the human condition. If you're easily offended or an LA Clippers fan please forgive me.
Ryan Alexander Kavanaugh | firstname.lastname@example.org
Director of Brand Development
Ryan enjoys video games, long naps on the beach, and humanity's most difficult existential questions. His long list of influences includes Christopher Hitchens, Ocarina of Time, that one time he stubbed his toe, and his first ex-girlfriend. Ryan also works as development producer in the television industry and still retains most of his soul at this time.